The Struggle

In a city where there’s always something to do at any given moment, you can never say you’re bored. Nor should you ever be, as if you live in the most expensive US city you’d better be making it worth every penny (I’m convinced the high cost of living is due to the fact that everyone wants to be in close proximity to the action, and that’s what we are playing for). The lovely thing about NYC is that there is so much to do, and luckily some of these things are free. Most, however, are not. There are concerts to see, bars to try, festivals and showcases to attend, and most importantly food to eat…and lots of it. Unless you have the hook up, which I can sometimes get by turning on the charm, there will be money involved and its not for the faint of heart.

Though my mom suggests “finding nice men to take you out” (she is an OG, I have not really jumped on this advice just yet). is the best Whilst in the throws of job searching, I have been doing everything I can to explore what summer in the city has to offer, and I refuse to turn down an opportunity or a good meal (even if my bank account hates me afterwards…which it does often). I spend the hours that I am not working at my restaurant gig exploring various neighborhoods and enjoying the simple adventures and stimulation this city supplies. Also, happy hours.

Harlem Tavern, where I spend all my money.
Harlem Tavern, where I spend all my money.

Going from a highly structured environment (college) to a completely structureless one has been somewhat of a struggle. I feel like I am on an endless vacation and find myself exhausted at the end of the day even though all I really did was make breakfast, workout, apply to jobs, read, make dinner, and go out. It’s odd but fun waking up in the morning and not knowing what to expect and acting on a complete whim. I know I can’t live like this forever, but there is something luxurious about this lifestyle. I often wonder how I am going to adjust to a real job where I have to be somewhere ON TIME at 9 am 5 days a week. It is completely different from going to school, holding an internship, or any other work-related obligation that most people my age have needed to do, as its no longer “part time” it is essentially every day for the next 30-40, possibly more, years of life.

 I want to build a future for myself and put in the work necessary but also focus on thriving in the present. In that sense, my struggle lies in enjoying my life right now but also wanting/not wanting to work. Luckily after talking to my friends, I know I’m not alone in this and not completely insane (just extremely optimistic). Everyone wants to make their passions their career, but this is even more the case for me as I cannot work in a place I hate or that does not inspire me/motivate me to be at my best every day. Though I do not expect my first job to be my last, nor do I want it do, I am holding out for a job that is the absolute right fit, as I want to give it my all. Until then, I’ll be reading for fun, drinking on Sundays, and having a great damn time.

Living alone and being unemployed affords me an incredible amount of flexibility to do various things, such eat candy for breakfast or go to out on Sundays, Mondays, and Tuesdays (aka the weekend for New Yorkers). It is freeing, scary, unpredictable, and it tests my willpower and strength daily. It also tests my wallet, as I am the absolute worst when it comes to budgeting (which has to change). I certainly can’t say that I’m struggling, but I can say that I’m having the time of my life. I do need to start cooking more though. This going out to eat every night shit is not going to fly forever.

3 thoughts on “The Struggle

  1. Patty @ Reach Your Peak

    So jealous you’re living in NYC. It’s always been a dream of mine. I hope I can move close to NYC with my bf soon…he isnt’ a fan of NYC so somewhere in hoboken or jersey city would have to do 🙂 Next time I’m in the city we should have a meet up!

    HCXO,
    Patty

    1. Ella Greene

      Hey girl! Yes I would love to meet up. Jersey is close enough so hopefully you can do some convincing 🙂 love the blog btw! Thanks for the support, and let’s connect on twitter if we haven’t already. @soellaquent

  2. Michael Lin

    I totally see where you’re coming from. I’ve pretty much been in the same boat since I graduated last year (albeit in a vastly different city in San Diego). I also tried to hold out for that “perfect” job for awhile, and still will, but no matter what keeping an open mind and staying patient really helps us post-grads rule our twenties!

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